Who hasn’t felt fear and doubt when trying to achieve a goal or a dream? When you try to bring change into your life – going back to school, changing jobs, becoming healthier or more confident –, fear and doubt may start to find their way into your mind and body.
How? You may experience a tendency to procrastinate, a lack of confidence or trust in yourself, have anxiety or low energy, or feel hopeless or powerless. Thought patterns or mental blocks start to appear: I can’t do that, I’ll never find a job that I love, I’ll never make enough money, etc. You may even have physical pain or discomfort.
On an energetic level, dealing with fear and doubt can block one or several of your energy centers (chakras) – fear is often found in the root chakra-, resulting in blocking the flow of energy in some other parts of your body, most commonly the lower back, hips or legs. In Traditional Chinese medicine, emotions are linked to specific organs, and fear is held in the kidneys. So, don’t be surprised if you have low energy, discomfort or pain in those areas, and are unable to move forward.
How to work with these inner obstacles? The first step is recognizing that they are present, and working with them rather than trying to avoid them. What I have found is that People’s fears are usually coming from a variety of connections in their energy – and sometimes they aren’t fully related to what they actually think they are afraid of. So, my goal is to find where that energy lies in the body, help release it, and invite a quality or energy that is needed– whether it is hope, confidence, trust, or inner power. When the flow of energy is restored, you feel more at ease and eager to bring the change you’ve always wanted.
Below are a few exercises to work with those feelings of fear and doubt:
- Revisit past successes: remember a past situation when you had to make a difficult decision, felt overwhelmed or experienced self-doubt and fear. Close your eyes and start feeling the emotions or sensations resulting from that situation in your body. Now recall how you were able to move forward, what you did to overcome that situation. Make sure to feel in your body and mind that feeling of SUCCESS. You may want to journal your experience or list some of your past successes.
- Say affirmations/mantras. Starting the day with an affirmation is a powerful way to ‘deprogram’ your mind from mental blocks or self-sabotaging thoughts, and invite new positive thoughts that will help you create what you want. You can come up with your own mantra, or use the ones listed below. My suggestion is to say your affirmation out loud 3 times before you get up or in front of the mirror.
- I am not my fears.
- I choose to release fear and invite trust
- I live and move in a safe and secure world. (Louise Hay)
- I free myself from all destructive fears and doubts. (Louise Hay)
- I have the power to make changes. (Louise Hay)
- I am always divinely protected. (Louise Hay)
- I am capable of achieving what I want for myself
- I trust that everything will work out for my highest good
- I have the right to – get the job of my dreams, take some time off, etc.
- I deserve – to have a good life, to have a raise, etc.
- My decisions are right – I trust my judgment
- Find the right support: It’s important to recognize that you need help. So, ask yourself “what is the right support for me at this time?” Is it a coffee with a bubbly friend, a weekend away, emotional support, an accountability buddy, someone that will ‘kick your butt’, or a supportive group? Maybe it’s a combination of all! And make sure to stay away from those friends or family members that would tell you something negative about your situation, and are not able to provide positive, supportive advice.
- Take some Distance: Have you noticed that when you are in a situation, it’s hard to find the right solution. But when friends or family ask for your advice you seem to find the solution more easily. Yes, it’s easier because it’s not your problem, but also because you have more perspective, or more distance. When you are in ‘it’, it’s hard to see the full picture. So, try distancing yourself – either literally or mentally, and invite a new perspective. Personally, I know that a few hours in nature has the ability to bring that distance, and help me see the situation with new eyes so I can move forward with more ease and confidence.
- Break your big goal into smaller steps: Have you ever thought that your goal or dream is an insurmountable mountain you are trying to climb? You are not the first or the last one to think this! Sometimes our goal seems so big that we think we won’t be able to reach the top of the mountain. But instead of aiming for the top of the mountain, why not climbing smaller hills first, or climb this big mountain in steps? Breaking your big goal into smaller steps can really help visualize the actions that are necessary for you to reach the top of mountain. It may feel less scary to have smaller steps or goals, and most importantly it gives you a starting point. It will also help build your confidence along the way, and you’ll be able to use those smaller achievements to reflect on your past successes 😉 (bullet point #1)